Life is such a journey. What you thought meant everything to you 5 years ago could mean very little today and vice versa. This journey that we call life is so much different then I was thinking as I sat in school and thought of being married, having kids, and what the Father was going to do with my life.
I think so differently even from just a year ago. Things I thought were necessary and completely important are now very expendable and even some are viewed as not desired or needed at all. Sometimes trying to figure why things go the way they do or work out the way they do is just a waste of time. You can worry or trust in any situation, big or small.
My “key to happiness” has continually changed while I have lived, loved, and learned. I would always make goals and conclude that when that goal was met, happiness would occur. This, my friend, is a very sad road. I lost all the meat of the times in between. I would always be looking to the future and never content with the present.
Those thoughts then lead me to a road of desiring to find contentment. Some things in life are what they are. Regret won’t change it, guilt won’t change it, and sometimes the Father chooses not to fully explain things in our life.
I might not have as many accomplishments as I have wanted. I might not be as skinny as I want to be. I might not be the mother or wife I thought I would be. I may not know as much as I have wanted to learn.
It is good to have learned that failure is not the end, that if I were as skinny as I wanted to be I could not enjoy the occasional junk food I like so much, I am the wife and mother my child and husband need me to be, and learning and unlearning things in His time take deeper roots.
“The word which came to Jeremiah from the Father saying, Arise and go down to the potter’s house, and there I will announce my words to you. Then I went down to the potter’s house and there he was, making something on the wheel. But the vessel that he was making of clay spoiled in the hand of the potter, so he remade it into another vessel, as it pleased the potter to make.”
This next statement is a BIG deal for those that know me and know me well; I accept who I am, I know a masterpiece isn’t made overnight and it is ok that there are things that I am working on. I am a vessel that has spoiled a few times already in my life, and probably will do so a few more. I have a potter that has and will always remake me into another vessel pleasing in His sight. I am who I am supposed to be right now and only time will get me where I am supposed to be in the future, nothing else. I am comfortable in my own skin.